Topography of Terror & the Cold War

July 10, 2016:

I slept in until the bells started ringing. I don't remember what time it was, I just remember thinking that the bells hadn't gone off the day before, and then realizing it must be Sunday.

I didn't have a clear plan for the day either. I considered some of the other tours that I could do, and some of the museums, but I wasn't enthusiastic about anything. I'd received some comments on Facebook about Berlin being the greatest city in the world, and that I should make the most of it, and on the outside I knew that that was true. On the inside I was struggling with something, and I wasn't really sure what. I just knew I needed to start moving. I bought the hostel buffet breakfast and then took the U-bahn to Alexanderplatz. The day before I had purchased a tourist pass for the transit system because it seemed like every time I tried to use the machines to get a ticket, the machine froze and then everyone behind me in line thought I was really stupid (this was probably true). Of course, I forgot the tourist ticket in my locker at the hostel - at the time, I thought I had just lost it or thrown it out by mistake, or it would have been an easy fix to walk back to the hostel. I wasn't "all there", and I scraped together my coins with just enough for a one-way ticket.

I had a banana Nutella crepe in the market and then wandered around the square in Alexanderplatz for a while. A man approached me, talking a mile a minute in German, and I had the impression he was selling something or wanted to conduct a survey. I gave him my most helpless "tourist in the wild" expression, and asked "Sprachen zie Englisch ?" He answered, "Yes, but it has to be done in German," and he left. I continued to try to sort out my map. I was interested in the Jüdisches Museum Berlin and remembered that it would be near the Holocaust Memorial, so I began walking in that direction. For good measure, I thought I would at least walk around Museum Island to see what it was about, and was rewarded with an artisan's market where I found a magnet to add to the collection on my fridge, and a lot of interesting art that I wish I could afford (in terms of space in my luggage and financially). I was in no rush.

My walking took me back to Checkpoint Charlie. We hadn't had a lot of time to explore the area the day before, and I had heard that it was extremely kitsch, so it wasn't at the top of my list. The men dressed as American soldiers having their pictures taken with tourists was certainly kitsch, but the walls surrounding one of the paid exhibits included a timeline of the history of the wall. I started by reading one of them, and then couldn't stop reading them. Before I'd finished, I was thoroughly sunburned, but had a much greater understanding of the Cold War, and a greater understanding of the foundation of WWIII that we are currently living through. American occupation of Afghanistan was a response to the threat of the Communists in the USSR, and the weaponry and training that was provided to the Afghani (including Osama Bin Laden) was used against the Americans at the outbreak of this war. Western occupation of the Middle East is the source of most of the conflict happening now. Imagine if the Americans and Soviets had decided to negotiate a peaceful solution to their conflict after the destruction of WWII instead!

The obsessive need to read every panel despite the threat to my safety (in the form of burning skin cells) should have indicated to me that there was a problem, but I still did not clue in that this was part of the bigger picture of staying in and reading every night, and not feeling like I had enough energy or courage to make new friends at the hostel.

Down the road, the Topography of Terror museum had been recommended as something worth seeing if you were interested in WWII and the Holocaust. I read a lot of historical fiction, and there is so much that is set in WWII. I recently finished reading All the Light We Cannot See by Anthony Doerr, and it was rewarding as a reader to see panels dedicated to the role of the radio in both propaganda and warfare. There were panels about every aspect of the war, and everything that led up to it. The museum is free. I must have spent several hours there, and many times I felt sick.

Overall, most of my new learning was about the conditions in Germany as the Nazi party rose to power, and then how that power was wielded before the outbreak of the war, building on what I had learned through fictional anecdote in All the Light We Cannot See. Some of my learning was about the conditions in the different occupied/collaborating countries during the war. I have a lot of knowledge about what happened in France because of books like Sarah's Key by Tatiana de Rosnay, and even about what happened during Kristallnacht because of books like The Far Side of the Sky by Daniel Kalla, but I did not have much knowledge about what had happened in Belgium or Norway during the war.

And I read panels about the resistances happening in various countries. Another book I'd recently read was A Train in Winter by Caroline Moorehead about the role of women in the French resistance who were sent to Auschwitz. Many of those involved in the resistance against fascism were members of the Communist party. Of course there was information about the concentration camps.

I took a break to have a Coke in their cafeteria. What was most striking to me was the treatment of survivors of the Holocaust and the citizens of Berlin after the war.

Women were harassed and raped by the "Red Army" when the Soviets arrived in Germany.

Each side of the war dealt differently with denazification. Many Nazis were absorbed back into the system and most of the blame was placed on higher ups in the party who had committed suicide or escaped to other countries. I had watched Labyrinth of Lies on Netflix before leaving, which deals with the exposure of Nazis continuing to work in the public service even though they had been directly involved in the SS and Auschwitz.

On either side of Germany, survivors were denied reparations if they had been politically involved on behalf of the Communists (in West Germany) or the Fascists (in East Germany). In West German, a law was passed in 1950 that could retroactively revoke or simply deny restitution to politically active communists.

After the war, every woman aged 15-60 had to register to clear the rubble in the city. They cleaned and stockpiled bricks for rebuilding.

I was emotionally depleted. I had no more energy to go to the Jüdisches Museum Berlin, but after reading this review, I don't feel so badly that I missed it. I returned to the U-bahn where a man was playing beautiful violin music (balm for my soul), but I was short 20 cents for the ticket I needed. This transit system was the bane of my existence for the three days I had to deal with it. I climbed back up the stairs, each step taking energy I didn't have, and saw the Balzac Coffee shop and opted to break my 20 Euro bill with some cheesecake. It was the first time I had an entire interaction in German.

And it totally paid off.

Back at the hostel, I had my second halloumi burger, and stayed in the lobby to watch France and Portugal in the Eurocup 2016 finals. I was still feeling a heaviness that I couldn't explain. The first half was so boring, and I was trying my best to be excited about soccer because it's so popular in Europe, but I couldn't feign interest any longer and I knew I had to be up extremely early to catch my train so I packed my things and went to bed.